Hello Interwebbers with the Wifis and the bits and the bytes. I’m here for you all. I was gone but now I’m back. I’m just delusional enough to believe that you may have missed my blog last week and I have an explanation. I’m aging. Now before half of this league collectively rolls there eyes, please understand. I’ve just had my 33rd birthday which was the age of Jesus when he died. Now I have made everyone collectively roll their eyes. I’m also 4 years older than my dad when I was born which means I’m dang close to the age when my sister Jodi was born. Make no mistake, I’m not going through a midlife crisis. I have committed to buying a van and I will make good on that commitment. I’m not even really sure what I “classic” car from 1995 would be at this point (a Corsica? a Neon?). I will also never buy the skinny jeans or the neon colored clothes the kids wear now with their hippin and their hoppin. But I am a bit nostalgic. Please keep fresh in your mind while I explain myself, I have not been helping myself with this condition of reminiscing. I have “celebrated” my 10 year college reunion by driving back to my 2nd hometown Fargo-Moorhead and visiting my old haunts and old friends (yes, I had friends...some). My son has started school this year. He is old enough where I have memories of his age. And when I get a word in edgewise I talk about it. He listens to them but I know that if he wasn’t 5 or half my size he would nod politely to my stories and “that must have been a nice time for you” and change the subject. I have also been in the process of going through house cleaning before winter which is full of memories. For instance, yes I still have my Superman cape from when I was 6 and no I don’t wear it anymore. It’s for my sons to wear only now. I definitely do NOT wear it under my business casual Land’s End shirt for for some extra confidence for a big day at work. That’s just creepy.
And finally I have just recently seen a very good documentary on my favorite band of all time which takes me back to the good ol’ days. Back to a much simpler time when your choices were tape or CD. Back when your favorite band was actually on MTV and it’s not because they are pregnant or can fist pump. That band was Pearl Jam. Even though it’s been 20 years and I’m a self conscious that they were because I’m well aware that they became iconic for the grunge scene at the time which is now as outdated as a goatee, a hemp necklace, or a flannel shirt with non blue collar purposes. The documentary was exceptional but I came to realize how old this band is and how different they are now. I have a bucket list of concerts I want to go to and they are on this list. So far, the only band I can cross of is Springsteen. I saw them 3 years ago and it was very memorable. However I couldn’t help but think that though they played all of their most treasured songs, it was much more like a tribute concert than brand new experience for the band and for the crowd. The crowd knew every song and they had certain movements or chants with every song because the songs were played over and over for 20-40 years. There was was no new ground explored and no new experiences to be had. The idealism the of the 70s version of the band has changed to an idealism of the aughts. Overall, it made me want to get in my George Carlin commissioned telephone booth and go back to see the 70s version. I feel that my all time favorite band since I existed, Pearl Jam, would now be the same way too. I would have an experience if I went now but ultimately I would wish to have bought a ticket when I was 13 and head to the mosh pit. Which if anyone knew what I looked like at the time knows would have been either incredibly comical or possibly fatal.
New inspiration and talent is popping up from new and mostly younger people daily. We can see progress in a variety of mediums and at my age that can be threatening but I can also be very good. It’s a constant out with the old and in with the new. And while the old is to be celebrated, what we ultimately celebrate is what they were like when they were new. For example:
MP3s vs. Streaming: At one point we all hated the idea of music being trapped on our computer, CDs were just so much more versatile you know? And lo, everyone has some type of MP3 player. But at least we could own the music, even if it was electronically. Now with Pandora or Spotify(which I highly recommend) you don’t even have the pleasure of owning something anymore. It’s somewhere in the ether or “cloud.” But it’s now cheaper and more comprehensive. I don’t have to secretly own a copy of “Right Here Waiting for You” by Richard Marx. I can just listen to it on Spotify after everyone else is asleep with my mullet wig on. My mullet wig is permed in the back...Kentucky Waterfall style.
Original movies making the most money/ People blindly going to blockbusters like they have a subscription to them: Back in my day the best movies seemed to make the most money. Consider this top ten:
http://boxofficemojo.com/yearly/chart/?yr=1994&p=.htm vs this: http://boxofficemojo.com/yearly/chart/?yr=2011&p=.htm
Either people compulsively go to terrible movies because we feel the need to pay for tremendous psychological and sensoral pain or we’ve lost any idea of constitutes a meaningful film or an original idea. That being said: http://tinyurl.com/73usldq
Donovan McNabb / Christian Ponder: McNabb is one year older than me. He’s been to a Superbowl and to a ton of pro bowls. He’s got soup money. The Eagles were on point to make another Superbowl run with him. Then the Redskins happened and now he’s our problem. I was actually in favor of the move since I know that Gino Torretta and John David Booty happens all the time. However, it became apparent that, like many an aging superstar in Minneapolis, he said all the right things but you could see in his eyes he was thinking “What am I doing in this god forsaken frozen hostile wasteland?” While Favre being here and leaving was much like this video:
McNabb being here was like this video:
It’s the same sentiment but less believable. And without a keyboard attached to a wall at a loading dock. (Although those kids are crazy talented. Especially lead guitar. Amazing)
Dominant Defenses / The Packers as a good defense: I just remember the Ravens, the Steelers, the Giants, the Redskins even the 49ers they would shut you down and you were lucky to get 14-10 win and have less than 3 players injured. Right now the Packers defense is seen as one of the top defenses in the league and they are giving up just as many yards as the Packers are gaining on offense and just as many first downs. They are 31st in the league in passing yards allowed. Their points allowed isn’t great either. But because their offense is stratospheric in scoring they are undefeated. They remind me of the 1998 Vikings except they probably won’t choke. (These last 2 years are a nightmare right? I’m going to wake up soon. I need a totem like in the movie Inception)
Well here’s to the new day. Here’s the matchups. I’m not giving a complete rundown but I’m going to highlight key bye week losses for each team:
Big Blows vs Team Boys Club: Blows: Jonathan Stewart / Club: Adrian Peterson and Visanthe Shiancoe
Levanger’s Bangers vs Team Kent: Bangers: Steve Smith / Jason Hanson / Kent: No one (really)
B. Dalton Brookdale Mall vs Mono Peligroso Mall: No One / Peligroso: Deangelo Williams aka No one
Big Ben’s Life Coaches vs Kardia Kidz: Kidz: Cam Newton / Lifecoaches: Maurice Jones-Drew
We Don’t Fumble We Mumble vs. Rain Dancer: Fumble: Lions D, Matthew Stafford, Percy Harvin / Dancer: Calvin Johnson, Jahvid Best.
Well we have a lot of kindred spirits up against each other this week. We have sons vs. fathers, brothers in law. We have a battle for first place in the Einhorn division. Remember we have 8 spots in the Playoffs this year. I admit that’s kind of like handing out particpation ribbons but anything can happen once you get there. Let’s get it done!
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